The following quotes are paraphrased from various translations of The Enchiridion by the Stoic philosopher Epictetus (AD c. 55-135).

“The things we control and the things we don’t.”

I don’t know whether the goddess of vengeance Nemesis is masquerading as Mueller, but I do know I can never walk out of the long shadow Mueller’s inquiry cast upon my GREAT win in 2016.

“When you are about to take some action, think what it is that you are about to do … Everything hast  wo handles, the one by which it may be carried, the other by which it cannot.”

Did I use the wrong handle when pulling American troops out of Syria, General Mattis?

“Since reason is that by which all other things are organized and perfected, the reason should notremain unorganized.”

Alas, whenever I’m thinking reason remains unorganized. It has always been like this.

“A person’s opinion is insufficient concerning truth. That’s why for weights and measures we are notsatisfied with mere appearance, but for each we have discovered a certain standard.”

The New York Times is indeed a gold standard in journalism.

“Half-truth may be all false.”

I wholeheartedly agree that false news is not the truth. Fox News is FAKE NEWS.

“We have complete control over our opinions.”

I’m afraid my tweets betray this opinion.

“No great thing comes suddenly into being … each thing is increased and saved by the corresponding works.”

“The Wall will work because the wheel works.” Did I tweet that? It took tens of thousands of years to turn the wheel into the car. I’m breaking my promise of the Wall unless someone as tech-savvy as I can build the Wall in a year and make it work seamlessly like a flying electric car.

“If you want some good, get it from yourself.”

My tweets beautifully reflect my reality. Is your reality different than mine? Amazing!

“Nothing is worse than a false belief about goodness and justice.”

The Russian Witch Hunt Hoax? Who said that?

“How should we bear ourselves towards evil men? Should we not destroy them? No, show them theerror, and you shall see how they will cease from their sins.”

You see, I have always been right showing Vladimir Putin, Kim Jong Un and Mohammed Bin Salmant he error of their ways and they all have now ceased from their sins. Well, at least they have made promises.

“Nor must any woman seem beautiful except your own wife.”

O my beautiful Melania, I beg your forgiveness.

“When you are gasping for applause and counting your audience, are you wanting to be a benefit to your people?”

On my Inauguration Day, I saw a crowd that looked like “a million-and-a-half people” and went “allthe way to the Washington Monument”. I have now stopped counting the crowd and concentrate on my motto, MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN. But, by Jove, I don’t know how to do it.

© Surendra Verma 2018

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